The Journey
the day i decided to accept the Lord into my heart was a life changing event. that's sort of the reason why we decide to receive him in our hearts right , we want to see a change. i was tired of living in the lies and the darkness the devil had shown me, he made it seem as if there was no hope , i was just gonna forever sit and sulk in that darkness all alone. i knew then something had to change and in order for me to do that was to just give it all to God and let him come manifest in my heart.
my 7th grade year was the first time I had ever got saved. i remember my old pastor saying " now that you've been saved the devil will be after you even more." and of course me being me i was like yeah okay whatever let's just do this. i stayed in my bible all the time and i loved the Lord with all my heart. but i never really got the understanding of how the whole thing works. i soon began to stray away and look for my comfort and happiness in the world. that left me nothing but emptiness in my heart and a life full of unhappiness. 8th grade year passed i tried to get back in the word but it just wasn't there. things happened and I just kind of had lost all my faith. and kept my eyes on the things of the world.
then my first year of high school came. my 9th grade year the devil had me thinking was one of the best years i had ever had in a long time. of course that was a lie . that whole year i depended on myself and again the world. it might have felt like the best year ever but there was a lot of hurt and pain that went along with that year. i was unhappy with myself and the confidence i thought i had wasn't even confidence ( MY CONFIDENCE COMES FROM THE LORD NOW!) skip pass that 10th grade rolled through i kept my dependence on the world until towards the ended of that school year. i had got so caught up in my own world and consumed in the darkness that i knew something wasn't right and a change had to come.
i finally just gave up and i remember saying " God i cant do this anymore. i cant keep living my life like this, im giving it all to you. you do whatever you want with my life. this isn't me this isn't the life you want me to live Lord. my life is yours now" and i just cried out to him. at that point in my life i had felt so vulnerable. i always feel like at my vulnerable state i get more closer with the Lord. that's just me though. after that I had decided i was going to live for the king and nothing was ever going to stop me. so i got in my bible started studying more. i prayed for understanding and in that i gained a relationship with him. i just remember saying to the Lord " No matter what happens no matter how terrible things get im going to stand firm in your word. put my faith in you Lord. im never going to abandon this relationship again." and since then i've kept my word and going to continue to keep it.
granny and my uncle would always tell me about this church they was going too. and me being the shy person i was , i was like nah im good im going to keep going to the one i've been going too. until one out of know where i just heard the Lord say " get up .. go check this church out.." it kind of freaked me out but i was like uuugh okay. in the mist of that i just felt like if i didn't go i was going to miss out on something. so of course i was like ok ok im done with the excuses im going to go. so i get there and instantly fall in love. like i felt love radiating off of everyone. you could just feel the presence of God in there. its really a feeling that's hard to describe. and i just remember going to school telling my friends how amazing it was.
my 7th grade year was the first time I had ever got saved. i remember my old pastor saying " now that you've been saved the devil will be after you even more." and of course me being me i was like yeah okay whatever let's just do this. i stayed in my bible all the time and i loved the Lord with all my heart. but i never really got the understanding of how the whole thing works. i soon began to stray away and look for my comfort and happiness in the world. that left me nothing but emptiness in my heart and a life full of unhappiness. 8th grade year passed i tried to get back in the word but it just wasn't there. things happened and I just kind of had lost all my faith. and kept my eyes on the things of the world.
then my first year of high school came. my 9th grade year the devil had me thinking was one of the best years i had ever had in a long time. of course that was a lie . that whole year i depended on myself and again the world. it might have felt like the best year ever but there was a lot of hurt and pain that went along with that year. i was unhappy with myself and the confidence i thought i had wasn't even confidence ( MY CONFIDENCE COMES FROM THE LORD NOW!) skip pass that 10th grade rolled through i kept my dependence on the world until towards the ended of that school year. i had got so caught up in my own world and consumed in the darkness that i knew something wasn't right and a change had to come.
i finally just gave up and i remember saying " God i cant do this anymore. i cant keep living my life like this, im giving it all to you. you do whatever you want with my life. this isn't me this isn't the life you want me to live Lord. my life is yours now" and i just cried out to him. at that point in my life i had felt so vulnerable. i always feel like at my vulnerable state i get more closer with the Lord. that's just me though. after that I had decided i was going to live for the king and nothing was ever going to stop me. so i got in my bible started studying more. i prayed for understanding and in that i gained a relationship with him. i just remember saying to the Lord " No matter what happens no matter how terrible things get im going to stand firm in your word. put my faith in you Lord. im never going to abandon this relationship again." and since then i've kept my word and going to continue to keep it.
granny and my uncle would always tell me about this church they was going too. and me being the shy person i was , i was like nah im good im going to keep going to the one i've been going too. until one out of know where i just heard the Lord say " get up .. go check this church out.." it kind of freaked me out but i was like uuugh okay. in the mist of that i just felt like if i didn't go i was going to miss out on something. so of course i was like ok ok im done with the excuses im going to go. so i get there and instantly fall in love. like i felt love radiating off of everyone. you could just feel the presence of God in there. its really a feeling that's hard to describe. and i just remember going to school telling my friends how amazing it was.
Fast forward to May 21, 2017 i got saved again and it was truly a blessing. im so glad that i decided to be obedient to God and go when he said go. it's a blessing to be apart of the Living Word Church . and just the time i've been there i have learned more and grown more spiritually than ive done at the church i had been going to for years. when i say im blessed to be apart of the Living Word Church i truly mean it. i thank God every day that i get to be apart of that. I wouldn't go back and change anything if i had the chance to. God had a planned for me and it's not finished. i've grown mature spiritually, faith has become a huge part of my life and i've grown a lot in that area. ( its amazing seeing from where i started to where i am now. THANK YOU JESUS) i've developed one of the best relationships i could ever have and i never want to lose it. i never wanna go through this life with out God again. and now all i wanna do is tell the world about jesus and minister / reach out to people of my age. and that's what im going to do even if it means i have to stand for jesus alone. but the journey isn't over yet and im ready for whatever the Lord has in store for me in the future. Jesus never said this journey would be easy but i know in the end it'll all be worth it.
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